Mordhau
 CaptainGaymer
Knight
  • Likes received 2901
  • Date joined 25 Oct '15
  • Last seen 3h
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Knight 3201 2901

­čĄö

Knight 3201 2901

jax buy emperor

Knight 3201 2901

­čĄö

Knight 3201 2901

DO NOT BUY FIDGET SPINNER!! DEATH TRAP Please do not be tempted to buy one of these spinners!!! Caused me nothing but hassle since I bought the fucking bastard thing. It started off ok spinning it round on various fingers listening to the fast rolling ball-bearings spin around. It was quite satisfying and I found faith, peace and harmony in my new fidget spinner. As with anything new you experiment with it so I was pottering round the house spinning it on random shit like the kitchen tap and on top of the salt and pepper grinder, I even span it on top of me cats head he was fucking loving it wagging his tail and smiling. All was well and good I loved this new trendy stress relieving gadget! Until on night i was home alone really really bored out my mind. Girlfriend was at work house to myself yano.. i thought fuck it am gunna do it i lay there on my bed and put the fidget spinner on the end of my knob and gave it a massive spin it was fucking awesome i loved it was going soo fast it looked like my cock was about to fly off to Syria and finally end all this fighting bullshit I was amazed i found a new safe way to use my penis until it all went balls up the ball bearing in the main spinner seized and the spinner stopped dead but because it was spinning so fast previously it gripped and caused friction its left a huge blister on my bell end i cant have a piss or anything i have been to the doctors and he said he has loads of people in Injured by these ÔÇťtoys". Share and spread awareness these are out to kill us and it wont be long until it happens!

Knight 3201 2901

judgement was the best

i fucking HATED fighting the fencer dude because he just just spam his light and then medium stab combos all day and i was such a slow fat fuck i couldnt do anything

looking back on it i was probably just bad or something

Knight 3201 2901

Eh? You've never seen a pair of breasts before? And you're HOW old?! J-Jeez! Ahahahah! W-Well, we'd better fix that, then! Just close your eyes for a sec, aaaaaaand...
HERE! BOING!
AHAHAHAHA! You should have seen the look on your face! J-Jeez, anon! Th-Th-They're just sacks of fat on my chest, ya know! Do they really excite you THAT much?! G-Get a look at this, then! See how they bounce up and down! Jiggle jiggle! I-I bet you want to squeeze them too, don't you, Mr. Perverted Virginboy Anon?! G-Go right ahead! Honk these honkin' honkers as much as you want! Take your time! Heck, s-suck on 'em too! I know you really want to~! Just be careful: my nipples are super hard right now! C-Can't imagine whyyyy...~!
I-I-I-I-I-I bet you wanna see my vagina too! You pervert! W-W-Well, we're already this far! Might as well! I'm not wearing p-panties anyway!
S-S-S-So, what do you think? ...Well, I guess that ragin' 'rection in your pants answers THAT question! HAHAHAHAHA! Y-Y-You're such a pathetic pervert, anon! I-I-I-I bet it's the first one you've seen since you slid out of your mother's! L-L-Look how wet it is, too! Jeezums fucking Crikes, it's so fucking wet! I-I've never seen it this wet before! Look at what you're doing to me, you freaking pervert! Y-You sure know how to make a girl all hot and bothered! Oh, lordy! Christ-on-a-stick! You'd better take some responsibility for this! A-After all, when it's this wet, it's much easier to cram something up there! And I'm leaking like a freaking sieve here! You'd better p-p-p-plug it up RIGHT NOW!

Knight 3201 2901

go away cuck

Knight 3201 2901

­čĄö

Knight 3201 2901

lol, nice. i guess they're not accepting people based on what games theyve played in the past or how many hours they have in the genre, theyre just picking random people from a lottery

Knight 3201 2901

dont steal my memes yari

Knight 3201 2901

loot crates are SHIT and youre all SHIT for wanting it

Knight 3201 2901

­čĄö

Knight 3201 2901

dont try to wriggle your way outta this, fapping to cartoon humans is still better than animals

even if they dont look exactly like humans, its what theyrwe supposed to represent

Knight 3201 2901

jesus fuck whisper how many trap memes do you have

Knight 3201 2901

this isnt new

Knight 3201 2901
Knight 3201 2901
Knight 3201 2901
Knight 3201 2901

maybe if there were topics worth discussing that wouldnt be a problem ­čĄö