Mordhau
The Mordhau Alpha is out!

If you have backed the game on Kickstarter or bought it on our shop, check your e-mail for a message from us. You will have to create an account and confirm your purchase, then head over to your purchases to redeem the Steam key.

 ToLazy4Name
Knight
  • Likes received 9306
  • Date joined 25 Oct '15
  • Last seen 26 Sep

Private Message

Knight 5575 9306
  • 25 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

cool story my dude, keep killing innocent people for all I care, i'll soon be the one doing it

Knight 5575 9306
  • 25 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

TIL interventionism = conquering a hostile nation and occupying them until they agree with you

Knight 5575 9306
  • 25 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

yes goys keep destabilizing the middle east, good goys here's your daily allowance of shekels

Knight 5575 9306
  • 25 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

hi I rewatched the gameplay trailer and I got an erection and also I realized that the guy at 2:00 did an attack morph feint and that was cool and i'm really excited thank you

Knight 5575 9306
  • 25 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

why is this even a question

it's Monsteri by far

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

there won't be a one button dodge

why is this being discussed it's not gonna happen lmao

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@Lincs said:

@Rattsknecht said:
So we embraced the first genuine Mordhau fanfics.

not even close to the first

Sammy leans over the back of Havoc's chair, wrapping his arms around his lover's neck possessively.

"Whatr'ya doing with the Founder's Guild?" he asks in a sultry, playful whisper, gently stirring the hairs on the back of Havoc's thick, masculine neck. Havoc reflexively shivered at the touch and the raw Britishness of Sammy's voice.

Just as Havoc is about to silence his lover with a kiss, their combined passion drowning out the loud shitposting occurring in the Founder's Guild thread, Lazy crashes through the wall.

Covered in a fine, golden powder of cheeto dust and wall plaster, Lazy appears to be having an autistic episode. His massive, rotund body capers though Havoc's bedroom without restraint, accidentally crushing Sammy in the process.

As Havoc cries out in shock and anguish at the sudden loss of his lover, he is cut off brutally by Lazy, who vomits sticky globs of cheetos all over his head, blocking his airways. As Havoc collapses to the ground, Lazy begins to emit a high pitched keening.

Gaymer can be seen in the distance, vigorously masturbating over the grisly scene as he watches through the hole in the wall.

I have more

the only accurate part was gaymer masturbating

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@mrjoe said:

@Ares said:
Im now standing infront of an impossible task. I want to play this game non stop on the first day, sadly its also my girlfriends birthday.

You'd rather sit on your ass and get fat? You're mental state is a little fucked. Jump off a bridge.

JOE

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

if Reithur doesn't get hired by Triternion then I will be an ANGRY boi

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

i'd make fun of you for making a suggestion that has been made multiple times in the past but I don't think you understand English very well so I can't really blame you

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

good roleplay

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

m8 the dev team already speaks about a million different languages

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@EatAtRedLobster said:
Okay ONE more quick one.

Heat waves ripple over the desert with a unique vaseline quality. The edge of distance all glossy and distorted with an impressionist blur. The Cadillac cuts through the hot air with a howl like a dying animal as Jax grips the wheel with determination. Lazy's eyes are red and worn from the wind and sand that stings his face. He is defiant. His screams of joyful rage mingle and unite with the engine to create a roar of fury. The scene is that of a whirling hybrid of man and machine. They are propelled forward by their rugged volition and a burning sense of freedom.

"Why did we bring a convertible into the desert?!" Jaxs yells. "Because we're MEN!" Lazy screams.

Jax laughs and mashes the pedal. They become a silver streak. A rocket leaving a plume of ancient dust hovering in it's wake. The vibrating air yields and bends around them with aerodynamic grace.

All is silent. All is peaceful.

neet.jpg

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@Mihgee said:
okay thats fine gl all of you on growing this game into something worth buying in the future, but this forum thread has already shown me im not missing anything as is!

go away lol

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@LuxCandidus said:

@Lonerwurld said:

@LuxCandidus said:
The inclusion of a dodge key would actually lower the skill ceiling because using it successfully is just a matter of timing. Even parrying, which is not a high level mechanic at all, consists of positioning, precision and timing (more strictly than in the case of a dodge key).

Obviously. That's why there's no feint key, since like any button-press to execute a specific action is indication that no skill is involved at all, right?

I mean it's bad enough we have buttons to move, or strafe, or attack -- it's all just lowering the skill ceiling.

Poor game design, really. Why should any of the keys on my keyboard do anything at all?

How stupid are you? What I am saying is this: A dodge button is introduced. You are in a fight and an attack is coming at you. Do you position yourself correctly, quickly look at the incoming attack's direction and height, and time the button press less than a second before the attack lands or do you just tap the dodge key? Do you see how the inclusion of this mechanic completely negates a far more difficult one without adding anything of worth?

good troll

Knight 5575 9306
  • 24 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

get fucked

Knight 5575 9306
  • 23 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@Lonerwurld said:
Cool. NotToLazy2Troll is still here. :D

I wasn't aware that laughing at absolutely retarded statements classified as "trolling" these days.

Knight 5575 9306
  • 23 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@Sir Zombie said:
Does jonathan have his stand and does guts have armor?

Jonathan doesn't have a stand you fucking socialist

Knight 5575 9306
  • 23 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

cool thread

Knight 5575 9306
  • 23 Aug
 ToLazy4Name

@Lonerwurld said:
The range of skill will be much much smaller, and the meta will become "first to feint wins".

lol