• Likes received 2369
  • Date joined 30 Jun '16
  • Last seen 16 Oct

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Almost perfect.

Each of the Man-At-Arms should have motion blur from constant dodging.

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I have a carefully synchronized 17 point method I teach to each of our location managers on how to fish out and properly dispose of any dead rodent found floating in a deep fryer. It syncs up perfectly with this song:

which I play over a vintage pair of 32" Klephopfer speakers while barking instructions over a bullhorn. So far this training method has resulted in a near 100% success rate.

And you thankless bastards never even see the living hell we go through in order to provide you quality seafood at competitive prices.

You disgust me.

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@Jax said:
... you're saying the british army didn't have katana

That reminded me of this:

The KING has been graciously pleased to approve the posthumous award of the VICTORIA CROSS to:— Lieutenant George Albert CAIRNS (198186), The Somerset Light Infantry, attd. South Staffordshire Regiment. On 5 March 1944, 77 Independent Infantry Brigade, of which the 1st South Staffordshire Regiment formed a part, landed by glider at Broadway (Burma). On 12 March 1944, columns from the South Staffordshire Regiment and 3/6 Gurkha Rifles established a road and rail block across the Japanese lines of communication at Henu Block. The Japanese counter-attacked this position heavily in the early morning of 13 March 1944, and the South Staffordshire Regiment was ordered to attack a hill-top which formed the basis of the Japanese attack. During this action, in which Lieutenant CAIRNS took a foremost part, he was attacked by a Japanese officer, who, with his sword, hacked off Lieutenant CAIRNS [sic] left arm. Lieutenant CAIRNS killed this Officer; picked up the sword and continued to lead his men in the attack and slashing left and right with the captured sword killed and wounded several Japanese before he himself fell to the ground. Lieutenant CAIRNS subsequently died from his wounds. His action so inspired all his comrades that, later the Japanese were completely routed, a very rare occurrence at that time.

It sounds like someone was using the Flesh Wound perk.

In all seriousness though what a badass.

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Just be sure to only eat pre-1982 pennies, Jax. Those are 95% copper.

After 1982 they are over 97% zinc. Eating those would drive you to insanity which would result in a far greater loss. Delayed devblog updates.

Dance monkey DANCE!

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Cannot look in the mirror because his staff is too humble.

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I am hoping we might have more deployable items such as ladders, or a crossbow grappling hook that fires and deploys a climbable rope. This could serve as a nice workaround to aid in breaching in unexpected areas instead of the same static known points of ingress. I can only imagine how amazing a 64 player castle siege with grappling hooks and archers could be. Ye olde Utah beach / Pointe Du Hoc.

I would also like more traps such as tripwires and Trou De Loup pit traps. Bear traps are already irritating in DM though, so such additions might need tweaking or even deactivation in certain game modes.

Depending on the game mode I'd also really like to see player deployed spawn points similar to Rising Storm 2: Vietnam, provided it fits the gameplay well. A small tent could serve as the model for this.

Another thing that I think would be beneficial is extra stam cost on double and triple feinting. Essentially the same as the combo miss cost. If you feint again within x milliseconds stam cost is increased. I feel this would diminish that irritating and just plain ridiculous looking tactic where a fight abruptly stops short because a player engages in that pathetic "overhead feint overhead feint overhead feint" until someone panics. I would not, however, want to see it applied to a feint which immediately follows a combo feint. I feel that would be a bit too limiting.

As for perks I would very much like a ragdoll feign death.

A few "down the road" non-priority emotes I would also like:


Pointing with hand / Pointing with weapon

Crossed Arms (locked)

Sitting (locked)

And finally one more thing I would REALLY like to see is a second additional "normal speed" quarterstaff with decent damage. Something in the 5+ point range.

According to wikipedia this weapon sometimes had a metal tip, ferrule, or spike at one or both ends. I think that a 2nd quarterstaff with some decorative / functional metal ends could fit in the game very nicely not only aesthetically, but also as a logical justification for the weapon doing superior damage to the standard all wood quarterstaff.

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I felt you deserved something special for your work, Niko. Alcohol had been consumed. A sudden impulse became reality.

Many regrets.

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After playing long enough to get past the inevitable adjustment period that comes with a new patch I feel that I have played enough to get a solid first impression.

This patch is glorious. The current stamina costs, general combat, player movement speeds, etc. are in a delicate sweet spot. Previous versions have felt like the semi-enjoyable work in progress that they were, but with this patch Mordhau has become the solid fun game I was hoping for. I honestly love it, and hope the devs stick to this current core foundation with only very minor tweaks. In my opinion where the combat system is concerned the broad strokes are done, and small details are all that is left. Know when to put down the paintbrush.

It just feels RIGHT.

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It's Duke or higher. IMO a lobster emblem should be in the game even if someone does not submit one.

Even Torn Banner included one in chivalry as it has a legitimate history of use in heraldry.

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TFW the game has a yeet emblem, but might not have a lobster emblem.

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Aside from the overly restrictive parry turn cap and 1H stab gambles it's a fantastic patch, and a huge step in the right direction. Nearly everything feels more balanced and the overall game feels much more refined.

8.5 claws out of 10

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I eat it 364 days of the year. Today is the one day I get to enjoy something different.

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Today is my birthday (seriously). I can't wait to see what the devs got me. Oh an update? You shouldn't have!

Can you feel the electricity in the air? It's like someone is rubbing a box of kittens against Nikola Tesla wearing a sweater.

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Pay to play: Zero interest
Free to play: Zero interest
Paid to play: 5000 hours

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Mr. Chairman, I am equally disposed with the honorable gentleman Eru, who favored the forum with his sentiments in such a laudable manner, and move we engage in a candid and dispassionate investigation of the important business now under consideration, and to receive every possible information on the occasion in regards to this Guild of Founders.

I yield the floor and the remainder of my time.

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I think that is a fairly insightful idea, and could be beneficial in the long term. Requesting foresight and patience from this community will result in weapons grade screeching though.

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I am glad to see others who also indulge in the guilty pleasures that only chicken RP can provide.


Peck to live and live to peck.

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If you knew how nice she is you would fall to your knees and beg Lobster Mama to forgive you your filthy lies.

You now owe me no less than 40 hard wood sticks thicker than a mans arm, and twice his height.