I dont have to need to pull my dick out to pull it out.
Welcome back, everyone! It's been a little bit, because I had a metric shit ton of tons of shit to wade through.
LET'S GET READY TO PARTAAAY!
Fresh supplies, weapons, and trinkets from the tribute's loved ones are place around the Cornucopia.
These two are smart. Crushed, still plagued by possible insanity and terrified at the power he may unleash at the feast, chooses to continue his pacifist run of the Mordhau Games and kneels somberly inside his makeshift hut, meditating for long hours on the ways of rejecting the banhammer. Some time later, his eyes snap open. He knows what he has to do - but does he have the strength?
Max chooses to run far, and run fast. He knows he can probably outlive the tributes that are going to the feast, as long as they manage to kill each other off. If he can just hold on... a little longer...
Of the four that arrive at the Cornucopia, Humble and Stouty arrive first. Nothing is said - partly because they know only one of them is leaving alive, and partly because there's a language barrier. Stouty, using superior size and strength, immediately tries to close to melee range, a long bladed-sword held aloft above his head.
Humble's resourcefulness has not abandoned him, even against these overwhelming odds. He pulls out his short homemade staff, carefully worn smooth over the past several days. On one end of the staff is a tightly-lashed explosive assembly retrieved from a landmine. He knows he'll only have one shot at this. He takes a deep breath, and throws.
Ohshitsorry watches the explosion from a nearby tree, careful to stay hidden. He knows he can't stand up to anyone that was able to pull off a maneuver like that. After all, he had always considered himself to be retarded. But if he waited for Humble to leave, he could possibly -
His thoughts are abruptly sent into freefall as a hand pushes him out of the tree from behind.
There are only a few hours left in the day, and four tributes remain alive. Crushed is slowly making his way towards Humble Staff and the center of the arena. Runagate and Maxilator are hidden away.
Max and Runagate stumble upon each other. Neither is quite prepared for the fight, both starving and desperate, but Runagate manages to get a knife into Max's belly and in a panic runs the other way - back towards the Cornucopia, and the other two tributes.
Crushed and Humble both receive weapons in anticipation of a duel between the two. How will it go down? No one watching the games is sure. Can Humble and his quick thinking stand up to Crushed's silent determination? Will Crushed break his pacifist tendency to try to end Humble's life?
As the sun sets, all of the tributes stop to rest. Four cannons are heard overhead.
Find out... SOON! I'll be releasing the final night and the final day in a few hours.
Wtf i'm favela MacGyver lol
Being a subhuman conscript tier backer I stood no chance against the gold teethed melee gods.
tfw it comes down to Humble vs Crush, the ultimate showdown with Humble looking for revenge for his ban a while back
Jesus nobody killed anyone this time. Everyone just left eachother alone contently and died of natural causes or accidents for the most part.
I remember last time where everyone was bloodthirsty and this is just completely different.
Jesus nobody killed anyone this time.
Jesus nobody killed anyone this time.
My boy Humble literally fucking blew Stouty up into tiny fragments of overhead-spamming lesbianity.
fragments of overhead-spamming lesbianity.
fragments of overhead-spamming lesbianity.
Humble finishes his nightly rounds of the area around the cornucopia and is shocked to discover Crushed standing near the treeline. Wordlessly he turns and disappears into the foliage, beckoning Humble to follow behind him.
After a short time, Humble finds a lean-to under which Crushed is sitting with legs crossed. After a long moment to assess the situation, Humble sits opposite him.
The two talk for a long time about what is to come tomorrow. Eventually, they decide on a fair fight: no weapons, no tricks. Fist and foot, to the death, and may the winner take all.
As they speak, Crushed finally begins to feel the specter of insanity leaving his mind, to find more fertile fields.
It isn't long after that Runagate is inhabited by that same phantom. He struggles to sleep, haunted by the faces of those he's killed. He retreats up into the safety of the forest canopy and ties himself to a tree bough, trying to shut his eyes lest he see the tribute he pushed out of one of these very trees hours earlier.
The three remaining tributes are awoken at dawn to the sound of roaring water. The arena has slowly begun to flood, forced Crushed and Runagate towards the Cornucopia and the final confrontation.
Humble stands in the middle of the clearing, watching as Crushed once again emerges from the trees.
Unbeknownst to either, Runagate has made his way towards the clearing through the trees and is watching them both. He edges closer, a pilfered explosive in his hands with the detonator ready to be tripped. He visibly twitches with anticipation at the change to finally get rid of the competition for good, and put an end to this nightmare. The voices that started last night were hounding him all day, now. One way or another, this needed to end.
He shifted his weight just slightly, and the branch below him suddenly splintered. Before he fell, he thought just for a moment that he saw Ohshitsorry pulling down on the end of the branch, with a vengeful smile. But then, as soon as it came, the image was gone again, replaced by the rapidly approaching ground...
Both Humble and Crushed jump at the sudden crash of branches nearby, and at the deafening sound of the cannon shot. But before long, their attention returns to each other. They now know that whoever walks away from this fight will be the last man standing.
Crushed unexpectedly charges. Humble reacts just in time to duck under his wild punch and deliver a kick to the ribs, but belatedly realizes it will have little effect. In a cold fury, Crushed attempts to grab Humble around the waist as he moves quickly backward, but Humble wiggles out of his grip and gets behind him, trying to forced him to the ground. Crush heaves, and both tributes topple to the ground, wrestling wildly.
After a moment, Humble comes out on top. In his panic, he forgets his vow to Crushed the previous night - fist and foot only. He lifts the largest rock he can get his hands on and smashes Crushed's upraised arm, breaking something with a sharp crack. Before he can swing again, however, Crushed's other hand closes tight on his neck, and he finds himself flying backward.
Humble lands sharply on a stone outcropping, feeling something in his back give way and a cold sensation settle over his body. Crushed mercilessly moves in for the kill, grabbing the smaller man by the head with his one good hand and smashing downwards over and over until he stops moving.
Well, I gotta say. I was rooting for the ban man the whole time, with his whole nonviolence thing (up until that last part). But I'm shocked he actually pulled it out. I thought he'd fall into a frozen lake, or eat his own shit and get dysentery, or something. Congratulations! And congratulations to Humble, Runagate, Ohshitsorry, and Max, for putting up such a good fight and making it to the very end! Legends.
And to everyone else, you all know this was like, a week or two in the making. I understand Val's pain now. Thanks for your patience!
Two brave young demonslayers, FaffyWaffy and Macikeks, complete a dark pact and are transported to the Underworld to kill the God of Judgement, Seymour himself. On their way, they encounter shadowy figures from Mordhau's past, including ToLazy4Name, CaptainGaymer, Sammy, RebornChief, and more...
what did crush give you? huh? you sneaky fucking rat? rigged games smh
Now that was trippy and inmersive, great music choice.
It was a good run, i'm still baffled i made it this far, RNG and all.
Thanks for taking the time to entertain us all Lincs, you are good at this, that final scene fight was great.
Don't ever feel forced to keep going, you can die like Val and then resurrect when you want to.
HAHAHA jesus christ this game knows, every fucking time I try to get on that one tree on camp I die. GG and thanks Lincs
gg's boys watch out for angry dogs when walking through the forest
Nothing like a good ol' nostalgia trip to the pre-kickstarter Mordhau forums.
Was extremely excited for Runagate to win until he was killed by fall damage. At least now he can run through the gate of heaven (or hell) amirite gamers???
pre crush ban rampage more like tbh
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