Mordhau

The Mordhau Games 2, Part 2

Knight 513 1045
Conscript 4562 6301
 vanguard

@Frise said:
Starving isn't a profession, commie

Neither is being an idiot, but you are a professional at that anyways lol

Knight 105 274

Bodkin will shoot em all down ez

Baron 1607 5105
  • 2 Mar
 Lincs

Alright. Now that I have everyone riled up, time to delay this indefinitely.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
...JUST KIDDING!

The games begin... now!

DAY 1

d1.1.png

The horn sounds, and everybody scatters in different directions, with surprisingly little fighting going on.
Though, elweb, I gotta say, that lighter and rope combination is HELLA sus, dude. Just what are you planning on doing with those?

d1.2.png

Vanguard SEIZES the means of destruction from Runagate! With his newfound power, all private property at the Cornucopia will be forcibly redistributed... to himself.

d1.3.png
A true Frenchman through and through. Ready to start some riots.
And that's the end of the so-called "Bloodbath", folks. A sum total of zero deaths around the Cornucopia. Let's keep going!

d1.4.1.png

Frise, for whatever reason, decides that this horrible patchie-mutant abomination should continue on living its horrible, miserable life. He lets it flee into the trees.

d1.4.2.png

Jesus fucking Christ! Our first death of the games, and it's none other than Humble fucking bodying Ratt to death. I'm a bit disappointed; I thought Ratt was destined for great things. Sayonara, my drunk Russian artfriend.

d1.5.png

"release... fuckign... game already, stupid pigdog," he mutters under his breath as he peers at Elwebbaro through the bushes.

d1.6.png

Marox and Max team up to try to find any scraps of leftover Kickstarter money.

d1.7.png

Jax accidentally leaks game info on a live stream! -5 HP!

d1.8.1.png

...a shack out of which he immediately begins selling some delicious, piping hot Red Lobster™ Cheddar Bay Biscuits™! Seeing as he's alone in the woods, nobody takes him up on the offer.

d1.8.2.png

That;s not double K.O! hunger Games shit! is a fucking joke..

-

STATUS UPDATE

status1.png

Rough times for the Christmas Hat Guild. I had high hopes for them!

The first day has come to a close with only two deaths, surprisingly. It seems the forum-goers are more averse to conflict than we were led to believe... but will it last?

NIGHT 1

n1.1.png

The twilight hours find most of the tributes questioning their lives and their sanity.
:( poor Geach, I want to give him a hug right now...
Also, looks like Jax got fed up with some of that SA shittalking. Frise Frisedrags no more!

n1.2.1.png

91={{9001187393}} water dehydration problem solution baba ji in PANEM

n1.2.2.png

"Where.... p...patchie..." twitch twitch

n1.3.1.png

Spook pulls out the banhammer and eradicates communism from the Internet. Ohshitsorry runs away in panic, lest he himself be wiped from existence.

Rest in peace, Vanguard. Forever liberating the wage-slaves in our hearts.

n1.3.2.png

The implications of this conversation are pretty terrifying and I don't really want to imagine how it went down.

n1.3.3.png

"What if... what if Double KO isn't the point of all this? What if I've been wrong this whole time?"

n1.4.1.png

Brutal, some infighting among the devs. Poor elweb just wanted out of there, but alas, nobody runs from the art czars.

n1.4.2.png

And it looks like Marox finally found that Kickstarter money! He's had a chance to hide it from Max while Max was out murdering their colleagues. Will they keep working together, or will one betray the other?? Find out next time on the Mordhau Games!!

Knight 1269 3808
  • 2 Mar
 Frise

fuck you Jax

Knight 5187 6950

@Lincs said:
Vanguard SEIZES the means of destruction from Runagate! With his newfound power, all private property at the Cornucopia will be forcibly redistributed... to himself.

"Where.... p...patchie..." twitch twitch

"What if... what if Double KO isn't the point of all this? What if I've been wrong this whole time?"

These 3 killed me lmao. good shit.

searchs for a drawing in Ratsknecht body, finds one and gets himself an autograph using one of Ratsknetch's bloodied, dead hands

@Frise said:
fuck you Jax

That's the trash talking that got you killed.

Duke 986 1381
  • 2 Mar
 PadanFain

Better then the original

Knight 3135 7297
  • 2 Mar
 Punzybobo

125534_5.png

I will help u from the grave zombie

Knight 2267 4083
 Runagate

Hey cool i'm there let's hope I don't die :)

also vanguard wtf give it back

Knight 5187 6950

It's not his fault, his favela upbringing made stealing a second nature.

Knight 513 1045

Elwebb was actually trying quit Triterneon. Max gave him a traitor's death.

Count 801 3057

"Humble Staff strangles Rattsknecht."

Somehow I always knew this day would come.

Baron 1607 5105
  • 3 Mar
 Lincs

DAY 2

d2.1.png
Come on, again?! He already has enough bombs, damnit. At this point he's gonna turn into the Unabomber, or something.

d2.2.png

Max tries to wield a trident, but then remembers that they didn't add tridents to the game. He ponders his existence.

d2.3.png

Oh god. Oh god... not again. NOT AGAIN. It's gonna be just like last time...
d2.4.png

Some more jolly co-operation from various tributes. Interestingly, it seems like the God of Order, Marox, has teemed up with his opposite, Rob the Dark God of Chaos.

d2.5.png

Red Lobster accidentally buys into a Baba Ji scam and is riddled with bankruptcy, HIV, bad vibes, etc.

d2.6.png

I think this is the first big gang of tributes we've seen, and what a group it is! Two streamers, two forum regulars, and a serial spammer. The stuff of legends.

d2.7.png

It's a long, long way from SA. Speaking of which...

-

STATUS UPDATE

status2.png

District 7 is the first to be totally annihilated, leaving Humble as the sole representative of SA still in the game. Will he pull through?

NIGHT 2

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Some more jolly co-operation. Spook has thrown in with the spammers of District 8... to his benefit, or to his demise?

n2.2.png

Good luck, bud. You're gonna need it.

n2.3.png

Stouty MILKED

n2.4.png

Red Lobster finally gets their first customer! Jax is welcomed into the makeshift diner and offered a steaming plate of fried shrimp. Wait, where'd he get those?

n2.5.png

Alas. You might be the Dankest Meme on the forums, but you're no match for a god with a sharp sword and a sharper temper.

One Christmas Hat remains...

n2.6.png

...heh. This has meme potential.

Conscript 755 1558

But what was Lincs doing?

Baron 1607 5105
  • 3 Mar
 Lincs

@ohshitsorry said:
But what was Lincs doing?

Meanwhile
meanwhile.png

Duke 5502 13139
 Jax — Community Manager

where is patchie tho

also Frise got despacito-dragged ez

Count 801 3057

@Jax said:
where is patchie tho

also Frise got despacito-dragged ez

Now it all makes sense. That wasn't shrimp Jax brought into the shelter.

Baron 2357 3389
  • 4 Mar
 Xekratos

It's been too long. Mordhau Games are BACK

Duchess 789 3478
  • 4 Mar
 Stouty

NOOOO9OOO MY SUPPLIES !!!!!

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Knight 239 540
  • 4 Mar
 Duckalot

"Maxilator destorys Stouty's supplies while SHE is asleep."
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