• Likes received 1875
  • Date joined 25 Oct '15
  • Last seen 33m
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3512 4344
  • 19 Jan

@Sammy said:
Can you all stop sucking Lazy's asshole and giving him likes for shit that would get none if anyone else posted it, cunts.

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3512 4344
  • 19 Jan

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528 691
  • 18 Jan

This thread and the alts tbh:


743 760

@Whisper said:

@CaptainGaymer said:
your face would go well with a 'TRIGGERED' caption under it

True, I expect it on my desk by tomorrow morning

Pigeon delivers.

528 691
2089 2335

fuck you nigger

482 633
159 210
  • 15 Jan


3512 4344
  • 15 Jan

@CaptainGaymer said:
smart troll


570 380

A tale of Mordhau

Once upon a time niggers stole the white man's burden and ran 3 kilometers straight like if a chicken were in front of him.
Then a big titted lady sucking on a big candy. According to all known laws of aviation the Tuskegee airmen stopped communism with nigger airplane powers by bombing baby food factories filled with jewish kids who multiplied into 9 trillion left wing. Left wingers began to take left wing to the next niggerpalooza extravaganza bonanza.
Then suddenly the new nigger let one salamander loose, but they had to kill yourselves.
PENIS was the thing on Tims mind and regularly inside his rectum along with an enormous humble staff made of smaller penises cut from the finest black studs from Africa folded 10000 times in a dutch oven which also cooks Jews mixed with carrots and Mickey Mouse.
Reptilian cyborg vampires captured Marox and opened his helm, only to witness the glorious light that obliterated them. Marox was crowned God Emperor of the Mordhau forums, but then anarchists started to argue about politics but they got conquered by the big vigorous mighty Crush. With his polish nigger strength he began to fucking fuck everyone in the face with his Ashkenazi Jew mind powers.
CaptainGaymer was walking in the forest of raw vegan hippy elves looking for his fictional boyfriend with boobies and a big hard jiggly ass with a dick on it, when he encountered Shrek beating his thick boner. Then outta nowhere, an arrow flew past him and cucked the entire population of local squirrels.
The black knight aimed at, with his giant fucking arm cannon, the Emerald Archer who lost his pants because he pulled out his dick, shot his arrowhead cock at PSYCHO-PHYSICS NUCLEAR SATELLITE THINGY, causing a orbital laser strike on a city populated by chinese factory workers causing Trump to make america great again by removing all the muslims from the country, and nuking all taco bell locations.
Mordhau's development was going well but the forums got invaded by us. All progress ceased when transexuals created a communist utopia by pouring ass hormones into DerFurst's tight asshole who then started to moan and suck lazy's stinky toes because he has diarrhea in his mouth. Suddenly Roshawn appears and cuck in his butt.

Or is it?

1285 679
  • 1
  • 13 Jan

@EmperorDaemonas said:

@SirZombiethe3rd said:
Many strategy games if you want to trick other people. This is a game about fighting with swords and killing people in a violent manner.

No. It's about confusing people and winning you do not kill the other person you just cause him to rage. It's about KILLING people only in a roleplay manner. What happens really is that both of you want to win but to do that you have to confuse the opponent.
Do you roleplay? Fine. Than in your roleplay you kill people. What really happens is that another person get confused. And the proof is that he can respawn (so he is not dead).
And by the way, I think that there is needed to be surgery mod for mordhau so people that like gore can do surgery on their opponent if he loses and cut not only his limbs but also open his head and such things...
It's not violent manner, it's just animation. Maybe in a roleplay it's violent manner.
So enjoy the roleplay :)
But hey I might be wrong. I think that game is not violent.

I really don't get your point tbh

You are correct, game is about defeating people and all that, but you know, its a sword fighting game with realistic graphics, if you strike someone's neck with a sword, there should be gore because the game has realistic graphics. Its not that the game is about gore, but a realistic representation of what happens if you slash someone's neck with a greatsword is kinda expected and fun to have in a game where people are fighting with swords'n shit.

I really don't get you point, you don't want gore at all? Besides, if I'm not mistaken, gore will be optional, you can disable blood and all that shit if you want to. But people expect that a game where you fight with swords and shit to be, you know, violent. Because you are doing violent things like swinging a halberd in your opponent's avatar neck, and we expect that the avatar gets all fucked up because muh realism, and most of all, why not?

971 1312
  • 13 Jan

everyone is 6'5" strongman like bear no skinny men or beerbody

even babushka is stronk like wild beast

528 691
528 691
512 1988
  • 12 Jan
 crushed — Art

The hitboxes and body poses are done in a way so you do not notice any "ghost hits". Also, the hitboxes are a tiny bit bigger then the default model. The worst that could happen is "hitting air" against someone who maxed out the skinny body pose, however we fixed this by reducing how skinny you can get and now its just a little bit skinnier then the default pose. This was also due to aesthetic reasons since the max. skinny body pose looked a bit goofy before

512 1988
  • 12 Jan
 crushed — Art

There are no height changes and hitboxes stay the same regardless of male or female. Same goes for the body customization.

3512 4344
  • 12 Jan

Actual reason: Everyone who is already part of the community chats here, and those who aren't don't comment because there's nothing relevant to Mordhau to actually discuss that would allow them to wedge their way into the community. Until new shit shows up and generates actual discussion about the game itself, random people aren't just gonna hop in and start discussing completely unrelated things with a bunch of randoms they don't know. Hell, they probably won't do that even when there's relevant discussion because most people go to specific forums to talk about whatever that forum is dedicated to. Most people don't hang out and discuss unrelated things even if they're a regular.

374 482
  • 10 Jan

Vesanus spends his days carefully constructing dungeon labyrinths which are actually braille for "help me!"